Patron: Can I pee standing up?
Laura: That’s your call.
Patron: What if I make lots of noise while I do my business?
Laura: I believe that falls under the “naturally occurring phenomena” heading.
Patron: How’s your toilet paper? Is it extra soft, or is it that scratchy government surplus stuff?
Laura: You’re asking too many questions. What do you really want to know?
Man: Will you guard the door until I come out?
Laura: It has a lock.